I have been living on a roller coaster. Which is crazy because I get motion sickness.I have worked my entire life for the chance to put out a record, on a major label that I am proud of. That I believe in. I've been in Nashville eleven years and I thought I was prepared for what could come with that. Like how venerable you feel when you play your record for somebody new. Knowing that they are completely inside your head, inside your private world. Every single song is personal and sometimes you pray they don't know just who it is about! I have been in that room. I have been that girl. The day your song goes to radio (which was 3 weeks ago for us!), the same feeling follows. The naked in front of the classroom feeling, knowing everyone is watching the charts, some praying for your success, others for your failure. Just wanting the chance to have it heard. But there are a few things, quite honestly I wasn't prepared for. The first time you google yourself and you see that somebody loves your song. It's a good feeling. The second time you google yourself and see somebody hates it, and is questioning your existence in an industry you have given blood for... is the strangest, most complex.. wanna hunt em down and let the air out of their tires... well, you get the point. I have been told at this point to STOP googling myself by my husband. Which I think is really funny. I never thought that would be me. The last few weeks the birage of emotion I have had. The roller coaster I am on. Making a music video and then seeing our video for the first time. I have never been the girl who watched myself in the mirror preform, not as an adult anyway :) Seeing myself, and my beautiful sister on the screen. I keep telling everyone.. I can't believe it. But I really truly can't believe it. I keep saying each day just gets weirder than the last. Because, at the heart of all of this, we are just regular people who this kind of thing doesn't usually happen too. I feel like I have been playing the lottery for 15 years and finally got a winning ticket. . And every single day something wonderful, or heart breaking, or exciting and always always something NEW happens. And I just can't help but think that I am finally living out my dream. And the way that makes me feel... is so much more than I can contain in a blog. But I am certain you will eventually hear it in a song.
This journey is simply amazing.
Did I mention we are playing at the Ryman next week? I can't even go there or I will cry. again.
Gratefully,
Brandon
If you would like to see our new video.. click here :)
http://www.cmt.com/videos/coldwater-jane/484597/bring-on-the-love.jhtml
